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WHO GETS GRANDMA'S YELLOW PIE PLATE?
By the University of Minnesota Extension Program
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Just before Anna Krueger, age 85, was about to enter a nursing home, she held a family gathering to distribute her personal belongings. As each of her four children listened, Anna shared her stories while giving each child the significant possessions of her life. Anna Krueger was a trendsetter at eighty-five. She was part of a growing number of seniors and their families who are recognizing the importance of advance planning and discussion regarding the distribution of non-titled property. They are people who want to leave more than possessions - they want to leave a loving legacy.
You can be a trendsetter too. Leaving a carefully thought out legacy of your personal possessions is a gift to your loved ones. Left to chance, personal possessions can cause major disagreements and challenges for families and friends. By holding a distribution gathering, you can turn the passing on of your belongings into a celebration of your life. Your stories and cherished items can become your loved one's stories and cherished items as well.
Debra Frazier, the author and illustrator
of the award winning children's (and adult) book On
the Day You Were Born, spent
the last few months of her mother's life helping her with decisions
regarding her personal possessions. They used the book Who
Gets Grandma's Yellow Pie Plate? to help them make a plan.
As she says, "We made lists, laughed at items that were too ridiculous
to call valuable and made decisions that made our lives a joy during
this time." She says using the book helped turn something that could
have been hard into a marvelous gift for her family.
In her book, Who
Gets Grandma's Yellow Pie Plate?, Marlene Strum and her co-authors
identify several challenges of transferring non-titled property.
The first challenge is recognizing that personal property has different
meanings for each individual. Often the meaning or sentimental value
of the property is what makes it special, not the financial or dollar
value. Because the value is in the eyes of the beholder, people
have different perceptions of what determines "fair" and "unfair"
in the distribution process. This perception difference accounts
for much of the hurt and pain that can accompany the process.
Warren Hanson, the author of The
Next Place and Older Love, reminds us that all of
us will leave this world one day. And when we do, we will leave
behind a museum of ourselves for our loved ones to sort out. He
calls Who Gets Grandma's Yellow Pie Plate?
a no-nonsense workbook that lovingly asks us to face the inevitable.
This book is a great tool when you want help getting through the
emotions, the memories, and the practicalities of distributing the
collected stuff of a lifetime.
To learn more about this book,
click on COMPANION BOOKS. Who
Gets Grandma's Yellow Pie Plate? is also available for sale
on this site. This book and the Living
Transitions book
compliment each other beautifully and will help immensely with any
later life, downsizing move.
Sue Ronnenkamp is a nationally recognized expert in the area of later life, transitional moves. She is the founder and owner of Living Transitions , an Austin, Texas-based business that provides "hands on" help to older adults making downsizing moves. Sue also provides educational programs and resources including her book, Living Transitions: A Step-by-Step Guide for Making a Later Life Move , a long list of articles, popular presentations that shed a positive light and perspective on this topic, and a Business Starter Kit for Senior Move Specialists. For more information, check out Sue's web site at www.livingtransitions.com or call Sue at 512/407-8488.
Copyright 2003-2007 Living Transitions All Rights Reserved.
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